As adults we get lost in our every day responsibilities.
Adulting! It’s exhausting.
At times you feel like a robot going through the motions.
You blink and a year’s gone by.
You’re reminded every day about that project you’ve been meaning to get to…or how you need to make more time for…..
For what.
To ride your horse?
To Make Time For Yourself?
Or maybe you do and then you now feel that riding is a chore. (Ugh I’m exhausted but I HAVE to go ride my little dragon because we have a show coming up…)
How would your 12-year-old self-feel?
Would she look up to you? Would she be proud of what you’re doing?
When I was a kid I would visit horses on my street and feed them handfuls of grass and dandelions over the fence. I’d longingly look on when I saw a group of trail riders enjoying a beautiful ride at the park. I watched on tv dreaming of a day where I could wake up and greet the horses outside my door. I begged to ride the ponies at the fair or on the beach. I had to ride the horsey rides at the arcade. Obsessed doesn’t begin to cover it. I passed by horse-trailers and I’d pay close attention just to get a glimpse of a horse tail. What color is it? How many horses do they have in there?! Where are they going?!
I used graph paper and designed my dream farms….drawn to scale. Each square was 3 feet and I’d make 12 stall barns complete with tack rooms, feed rooms, wash stalls. Sometimes they were inside a covered gallop track that in turn led out to pastures….arenas…etc. My dreams knew no bounds.
Never did I expect to be where I am today.
My 26 year old self never suspected I’d be….HERE.
At 26 I brought home my first horse, Blade, twisted legs and all. He was free and I was simply proud and amazed at being able to call him MINE. That alone was enough.
The twelve year old me (as well as the 26 year old me) was jumping…giddy and wild at the mere thought of having a horse. Nothing else mattered.
NEVER did I suspect that I would own two horses.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I would own THREE horses.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could ever ride with high profile trainers.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could learn mounted archery.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could learn to sort cows.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could learn to love showing.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could go swimming with horses.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could go camping with horses.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could ride in a hunter pace.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could bring my own horse to a park (or anywhere) for trail riding or a fun event.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could own a horse trailer and HAUL my own horses.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I would buy a property and actually wake up to horses in my own backyard.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I could own a horse jump building business and build for some amazing farm owners.
But I did it
NEVER did I suspect I would get to have dinner with my idols. To casually chat with them about the animals we love most.
But I did it
Being human I often find myself stressed, distressed, or plain old burnt out. I forget to be thankful for what life has provided me already so far.
My life certainly doesn’t look EXACTLY like I wanted it to…I certainly wish I had pushed harder earlier in life to do something more with horses. I’m still fumbling my way around the horse world looking for the right footing; looking for my place and for where I belong. Not nearly as advanced of a rider as I wanted to be…not brave as I wanted to be, and I haven’t found a way to make a career doing what I love. Life has twisted and turned but in the grand scheme of things my twelve-year-old self thinks that life is pretty phenomenal.
My twelve-year-old self never imagined some of the great things we’ve been privileged to experience. Together that twelve-year-old and I are excited for our future self to once again make us proud.
You don’t have to have upper-level goals. You don’t have to have show goals. Your path shouldn’t look like my path. Your duty is to be as authentic as you can be as you make that inner twelve-year-old smile.
Maybe your dream is riding a horse. Maybe it’s to own a horse. Ride on the beach? Canter? Jump? Bareback Ride? Make a career with horses? Train?
Whatever it is go for your dreams. Stay open to your opportunities. And nurture the inner twelve your old that daydreamed of horses!
I bet he/she are proud of what you are doing now.
The Green Horseman 
Leave a comment